1 month (and a bit) on

In the past month (and a few days) I have (in no particular order):

- moved countries
- got married
- had at least 2 panic attacks
- cried uncontrollably about 3 times (and somewhat controllably a bunch of other times),
- broken my laptop (responsible for at least 2 of the 3 times),
- terrified Jeremy into fixing my laptop (by crying),
- said goodbye to my mum (more crying),
- read 3 very good books (shout out to William Boyd for 'Any Human Heart' - brilliant),
- opened but not read the drivers manual approximately once a day,
- baked brownies, lemon drizzle cake and cheese scones,
- got a social security number
- opened a bank account
- moaned enough about the lack of decent chocolate in America that at least 3 people have sent me chocolate in the post,
- acquired a mobile phone
- been running out of sheer boredom,
- considered applying to do a PhD as an easier way to meet people and make friends,
- signed up for a volunteering opportunity,
- eaten my weight in Jelly Belly,
- got myself hooked on private practice and flashforward (thanks hulu)
- slept for over 11 hours on multiple occasions,
- come to terms with having a very different surname
- reorganised most of the cupboards in the apartment,
- sent off visa forms,
- joined the library
- nearly engaged in a fist fight with a doctor about visa forms,
- suppressed the urge 10 times a day to throw Jeremy's very loud ticking clock out the window into oncoming traffic
- mastered skype
- dragged Jeremy to Ikea
- and Old Navy
- and Gap
- and Target
- bought Jeremy his first ever pair of Jeans EVER (this may be my biggest achievement of all)

It's been a month full of effort and will power. Neither of which come naturally to me. It's also been the wettest march on Massachusetts record, which hasn't much helped the effort and will power. But somehow I'm still standing.

A lot of the credit goes to Jeremy for making me coffee every morning so that I have a reason to get out of bed (you can't drink coffee lying down - I found that out the hard way), to my mum and friends who have sent care-packages to keep me stocked in edible chocolate and to the many many people who are praying and / or sending positive vibes and thoughts and candy my way.

I feel like I've turned a corner and gone past the hardest bit. But that may just be because the sun is shining and it's Friday - I've also not yet got into the driving seat of a car, so that might set me back a few paces (Jeremy keeps telling me how easy it is - I have a feeling he's in for a nasty surprise).

I'm happy. Not giddy smiley happy - not all the time at least. But calm I-can-cry-and-be-homesick-but-after-I'm-done-crying-I'll-be-OK-again happy. Marriage is beyond description. On the face of it there's nothing to describe and yet the world has changed.