foreigner

First let me say that if you read the previous post, you'll understand why it's been two months until this one. Change is asked for, it happens, and then time gets sucked into a black hole. That said, I've not been bored.

OK so I've a billion things to write about. Our recent trip to Asia and the Japanese guest house where there were different slippers for different bits of the house. The fact that maternity leave in America is just 12 unpaid weeks (no, I'm not pregnant). That not just blogging writing stopped since I went and requested change, but all writing and I'm a bit scared to start again.

But instead, let me tell you about the following exchange in our local Trader Joes (not sure of UK comparison... maybe M&S Simply Food except less stuck up and more chilled out Californian). Oh, and prefacing this by saying that I usually avoid asking questions of strangers, and now I know why.

Hannah: "Excuse me?"

Man (busy stacking shelves)

Hannah: "I'm sorry, excuse me, but do you know if you still stock Tofurky?" (Torfurky is sliced vegetarian 'turkey' that is pretty tasty and which J inhales regularly)

Man: "Can I help you?"

Hannah: "Yes, do you still stock Tofurky? I can't find it."

Man: "I'm sorry, what?"

Hannah: (getting flustered) "Tofurky. Do you have it?

Man: (confused) "SoMarKurNis?" (I can't remember exactly what he said here except that no letters, sounds or syllables were the same.)

Hannah: (In this now so need to press forward) "No. Torfurky? It's like the fake turkey sandwich meat."

Man: (Looking more confused, starts to lead me towards a section of the shop that seems promising enough. We stop in front of the sushi.)

Hannah: (Very confused)

Man: (hopefully) "fake Sake?"
(I should note that there isn't such a thing as fake Sake and it wasn't infront of us).

Hannah: (wishing ground would swallow her) "Haha" (nervously and cursing Jeremy for wanting this stuff) "no, I mean fake turkey. Turkey. Like ummm Chicken?"

(this could well have got to the point where I had to flap my fake wings and start talking about pilgrims giving thanks except somehow he at this point understood.)

Man: "OH, you mean TOFURKY."

Hannah: (Grimacing) "yes."

Man. "I don't think we have that."

(turns out they do have it, it was 2 feet away and when I finally found it after he'd questioned another staff member who didn't have trouble understanding me and knew where it was, the first guy stood over me while I picked it up asking  "that's what you want?" "you've found it?" "are you sure?")

I know I have an accent, but it's really not THAT different.

2 comments:

  1. LOL - i have had a lot of similar experiences, I am still unable to order a bottle of water at a drive thru and actually get it!!

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  2. Mmmm sometimes I just suck it up and ask for Wadder. I feel really rude - like I'm taking the piss - and more than a little silly but at least I get water!

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